Critics: One Step Away From Gossip
I’ve personally known movie critics. And the one thing that amazed me was that they had never worked on a set, never written a screenplay, never worked in Hollywood. And the worst thing, was that they wrote movie reviews because they couldn’t get jobs writing anything else. AND, they did it for free.
It’s quite clear that America–the world–takes the movie biz seriously. Simply imagine a world without movies. It’s almost as though the entire cultural fabric of the world would collapse. So good or bad, movies are here to stay and they are an important part of our lives.
So when movie critics are trite, or condescending, or use language that is more difficult to decipher than the meaning of the movie itself, I wonder what is their purpose?
Critics are no more important to me than gossip columnists or rag mags. I really don’t give a shit if Tom Cruise jumps up and down on a couch on the Oprah Winfrey show. And it’s certainly no reason to can his ass after he’s made gazillions for the studio that fired him. No, Mel Gibson’s career is not over because he got drunk and said stupid things. There’s a good bet the photographer who got hit by Russel Crowe deserved it. DeNiro punched someone too, if I’m not mistaken.
The only context in which these incidents might make sense is the context that these individuals are multi-millionaires. But if I put money aside and look at people as people, then their actions are no less alarming that the stupid things the rest of us do on a daily basis.
I don’t believe I’ve ever read a movie review that made me want to see a movie. I don’t believe I’ve ever read a movie review that kept me from seeing a movie.
A movie cannot be summed up in a sound byte. In fact, Hollywood itself is guilty of this as well. “This movie is great!” “A surefire blockbuster!” And other such pretentious accolades–made even more pretentious when the movie sucks.
I love the movies. I don’t have a favorite one. I don’t have a favorite Top 10. I have a favorite 1000…and maybe another 1000 after that.
Let’s look at the big picture here (pun intended). Just what is the purpose of a critic? What role do they really play? Is it too affect box office? Is it to prevent audiences from being shocked, disapointed or affected in some negative way? Isn’t that the role of the church, to ban movies deemed immoral?
Some of the best experiences of my life, and I’m including real life experiences like marriage or school or jobs or journey’s, are movies. Movies have a profound affect on my life. And considering the fact that millions of others see movies, I’m not all that different.
If you want to guide me, fine. If you want to point out bad acting, or bad writing, or the overuse of f/x, fine. Certainly, these are valid criticisms. Some movies I cannot for the life of me understand how the hell they got made. But I’ll discuss this with you AFTER you’ve seen the movie, not before.
So just when does a critic write his/her review? I’m guilty here of the same thing I’m criticising. I’m writing about movies that someone might read before they’ve seen a film. I’m even worse, because I don’t care if I give away the plot or the ending.
But, I’m also writing for those who’ve already seen the movies I’ve seen. If you haven’t seen the movie, then don’t read anything. Judge for yourself.
I’ve spent years learning how to write screenplays. I’ve sold one but it will never get produced. I’m now working on several works-in-progress. And what goes into writing a screenplay is far beyond most movie goer’s understanding of how movies are made.
Every movie is a small company, if not large company. Don’t ignore the credits. Embrace them. Hundreds, maybe even a 1000 people put a movie together. In the making of a movie, rarely are any of those jobs despensible. I want to understand what these people do. I want to know how movies are made. I want to know how they are conceived. I want to know the mechanics behind “greenlighting.”
But obviously, for many critics, their role is not to educate. They play mini-Gods with their arrogant and pretentious “thumbs up/thumbs down” approach to movies. You want to rate movies in terms of 5 stars? OK, then be prepared to take what you dish out. I give critics a thumbs down and a star rating of zero.
